waiting for the feeling to return

there comes a time in every man’s life when he must decide
when he must choose his way out of choosing neither side
when he must climb down off of his white picket fence
and earnestly claw his way out of the apathetic rut that he has slowly swiveled his heels into
there will come a day when he must realize
that grace and obligation have everything to do with one another
instead of praying for the orphan and the widow, he’s been preying on them
and while he’s been trying to fit the ocean in a cup
his brother’s heart has been overflowing with the Father’s love
his heart is feeble and his mind is week
never knowing the nearness of the grace that he seeks
he has run away
and into an embrace known only to this world
his feet have been set to walking
and his heart to wandering
he drips with sweat he was never meant to bear
and carries chains he was never meant to wear
he spends restless nights awake and alone
praying to the god that never listens
he’s been screaming
he’s been shouting
he’s been crying out
he’s been searching
he’s been seeking
he’s been dying now
longing for a touch
hoping for a kiss
he says, “I prayed my life would never be like this”
and he waits
he waits
sometimes we wait too long

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